“Tattoos helped me take ownership of my body when I felt I couldn’t control anything else,” Christina’s tattoo story

Christina (@christinaloves_clothes) is a fashion and lifestyle content creator, based in Northamptonshire – she adores playing dress up, has since she was a little girl. Now a mum of three who’s still with her childhood sweetheart, her tattoos have become part of who she is – helping her become more comfortable in her own skin. Here, she talks inspiration, meaning and what’s next on her list of tattoo ideas. Let’s dive into her tattoo story…

What made you want to get tattooed? 

As someone who’s struggled with body image from a young age, I’d always been intrigued by tattoos! I loved the way they looked and as a creative soul I knew I wanted one as soon as I was old enough. As a teen, there was definitely an aspect of taking ownership of my body – plus a small amount of rebellion!

I was always drawing on myself and even got a few henna tattoos when I had the opportunity. I’ve always loved to draw and loved the idea of being a tattoo artist but decided I don’t have the stomach for the pain/blood (on other people).

What was your first tattoo?

I got a small butterfly on my ankle at the age of 17. I was on a caravan holiday with my boyfriend’s family (now my husband) and they were always far more relaxed with rules than my own family. They were happy to take me along for a tattoo as my husband’s sister knew the tattoo artist and already had several herself. (My mum knew I was going to get one but I don’t think my dad was pleased, or even knew until after the fact).

How was the experience?

It was terrifying! I knew I wanted the butterfly – I had printed it out especially and I wanted some pretty swirls around it. But the guy who ended up doing the tattoo was a fairly large intimidating man who did little to put me at ease, and ended up doing a smoky swirl. It wasn’t at all what I really wanted, but I was too scared to say anything and he drew it free hand and just did it! I plastered a smile on my face – at least I had a tattoo now, I thought.

It didn’t stop me from going back the same week and getting a tiny heart with devil horns and a tail on my wrist. (This was covered up only a year later and was definitely a rebellion I regretted.) I’ve been meaning to get the butterfly covered for years, but never found the right design or the time to get it done.

After my iffy experiences in the seaside tattoo shop and another awful experience in Northampton, I found an amazing tattoo shop local to me and have been tattooed by several artists there. They really helped put me at ease and took the time to get my ideas right. Shout out to the Rose and Dagger Wellingborough (specifically Matt the owner and Nicole). Also Iggy (@iggy_inktattooist) who did my bigger pieces and has since moved to her own shop in Rushden.

Do you have a favourite tattoo and do you think tattoos have to have meaning?

I have a few favourites, and a lot of mine have some sort of meaning or memory attached.

My ‘self-love’ tattoo is definitely one of my favourites, I love the style and vibrant colours. It means a lot, as I was at a huge turning point in my self-love journey at the time, I was finally starting to feel comfortable with myself and my body. 

I also have a floral bee that my oldest friend and I both have, she moved to Australia in 2020 so it’s nice we have this connection still. I’ve known her since year 7 in school, and she was even my maid of honour. I’m buzzing to see her on her next UK visit (pun intended).

My shoulder/chest tattoo was a big thing for me, I got it on my 30th birthday after wanting it for a long time but never feeling like I could. This one was purely for the look at first, but I had it extended a few years later and I loved the idea of a bird cage signifying the freedom I felt in my early 30s.

My husband and I have got each other’s names. I think it was on/near a wedding anniversary and our designs are completely different but also similar in that we both have an anchor. I loved the meaning behind an anchor (being anchored together/ being each other’s anchor through life) and it felt fitting, as we have been together since we were 14! Mine is a fairly dainty design with two roses and three buds for our family unit with a small anchor, whereas he has a more traditional style anchor on his arm, with our wedding colours on the flowers.

Another favourite is my butterfly key – somewhat connected with the bird cage, it signifies freedom after covid and of having the key to my own self-worth.

What influenced the style of tattoos you have?

I definitely have a real mixture, I feel like the tattoo industry has changed a lot over the last 20 years, and so has my taste! I do love some of the more traditional styles and colours but am also very drawn to dainty whimsical styles too. I love florals probably over anything else.

Do you have any tattoos planned?

In my head yes, but haven’t got any actually booked! I have huge Pinterest boards overflowing with ideas, I want some inspired books I love and have wanted a mermaid and/or a fairy for a long time too.

Has getting tattooed had an effect on your body confidence and how you view yourself?

Tattoos have been a huge part of the body acceptance process for me, as someone who has struggled with body image my whole life. I’ve always craved change – changing my hair often for that dopamine release, my weight yo-yoing and becoming a wife and mother at a young age. I do feel that tattoos were a way to help me express myself, take ownership of my body when I felt I couldn’t control anything else and choosing the art and where to put it, just because I could!

Do you want to make people feel a certain way through your content? 

When I first started my page, I badly wanted to connect with other people who’d ditched diet culture and learned to love or, at least, accept their body. Instagram was the place I learned I could do just that without the need to change any aspect of myself.

I wanted to explore who I was and what I liked – as me, not just a mum/wife. I found many creators that were living life unapologetically in their bigger bodies and I really wanted to try it for myself and see how it went. The relief was immense. The heavy weight of shame and guilt for being in a bigger body has been something that has lifted gradually over time –I really needed to let go and allow myself the freedom to be ok with my body and accept it.

I adopted a ‘fake it till you make it’ mantra and started sharing my outfits and the clothes that made me feel good regardless of my size/shape.

My aim now is to show that you can wear what makes you happy, in the body you have now. If it brings you joy, confidence and adds a little sparkle to your day, why wouldn’t you? Life is too short to be unhappy in your body.

While I have been making healthier choices and have seen some changes in my own body this year, I really hope I can inspire others to embrace their current body and dress for happiness rather than focusing on covering up and being uncomfortable.

What do your children think of your tattoos? Do you think you’ll be taking them to get tattooed when they’re old enough?

My children have never really seemed to care much about them, to be honest. My eldest daughter has definitely shown more of an interest lately though, and sometimes asks to colour them in. She often comes home from school covered in doodles and I can imagine, once she’s old enough, will be asking me to take her for one! I’d love to get a mother/daughter tattoo with her one day. 

Follow Christina on Instagram and read more tattoo stories on our blog.

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Self Love Club member Sare Goldman

We chat to Manchester-based business owner Sare Goldman, a fat positive self lover who loves tattoos, empowering others and sharing her creativity.

Being a self lover is a journey that never ends, it’s about breaking the rules that society has set and embracing everything about yourself – good and bad.

I have dabbled in self love for around two years, I followed plus size girls on Instagram and started to follow their journeys, but it really came to life in June 2019. My parents were going through a divorce which hit me hard and I wanted something else to focus on. I had always struggled with my weight, I yo-yo dieted and I was never happy with my body. In June 2019, I decided to ditch the diet and just start to love and embrace myself instead. I started to take pictures of my body, clothed and unclothed (in underwear), and started to post them on Instagram. I was never prepared for the amount of support I got from other like minded people who were on their self love journeys just like me! Since then I have never looked back!

I’m very much an activist at heart and I strive to be the voice for people who feel that they don’t have a voice. So self love is present in my life every day. Whether that’s practicing it myself or by trying to empower others to see that they’re amazing!

Self love is about trying to train your brain to rethink the rules around your body and the clothes your wear. Of course I still get body conscious from time to time but it’s about always speaking to yourself in a kind way. No matter who you are, I can guarantee that you have something that you’re hung-up about when it comes to your body; whether that be fat rolls, cellulite, stretch marks or your teeth. Life is far too short to be worrying about what you look like. No matter what you look like, you are allowed to exist freely, you are allowed to wear what you want, when you want and live free from judgement. Self love isn’t selfish and you deserve to love your body.

Being a fat positive self lover can be hard at times as it’s about changing people’s mindsets, which can take a long time! I find that the best thing to keep me going in the right direction is to simply get dressed up and take selfies. It’s so empowering to look back on the pictures and think “OMG, I’m so gorgeous”, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with thinking so highly of yourself! If I ever get disheartened or body conscious, I just talk to one of the many friends that I’ve made in the self love community and they put me on the right track again! They are so supportive and it’s great to know people who are exactly like you.

Fat positivity is about accepting fat bodies and not wanting to change them. It’s about normalising the fat body and teaching people to not see fat bodies as “disgusting” and “unhealthy”. Being fat positive isn’t “promoting ob*sity”, it’s simply just trying to show society that fat people shouldn’t be shamed for just existing. I love empowering other people, I love encouraging them to see how gorgeous and amazing they are and yes, sometimes, people can be quite rude and ignorant but when you know you’ve empowered another girl to wear a crop top then it’s so worth it!

Tattoos have helped my self love journey so much! My body is a piece of art already so the tattoos just add to it. I’m not using tattoos to cover my body, I’m using my body to showcase some amazing work that makes my body look even more beautiful! I have around 20 tattoos and my first tattoo was when I was around 14. My ex was getting a tattoo and I was intrigued, so I bit the bullet and got a small star near my bikini line so my mum wouldn’t see it. It’s safe to say that I’ve had it covered up now! From the age of 16-18 I used to be obsessed with stars to a point where I have about five different sets on my body, all of which I’m planning to get covered up with some other amazing work!

My choice of tattoos have definitely changed since I’ve started my self love journey. I have a few women/feminist related tattoos and a few with empowering words on them such as “Stay True”, “Empower Women” and “Tough Girl”. My favourite type of tattoo style is neo traditional. I absolutely love the style and can’t wait to get more once lockdown is over!

Tattoos definitely inspire the pieces I create ! I can’t draw so the pieces I create are the next best thing. I started my business, Creative House UK, in July 2019, I had spent years trying to think of different business ideas because I’d always wanted to be my own boss.

Since a young age, I’d always wanted to be a hairdresser so took a fast track course to qualify. Once I qualified, I soon lost my passion for it. I then dabbled in photography and started to do model and family photoshoots, but then I found it too stressful to try and get that perfect shot. Then I had a lightbulb moment – “OMG, I can make prints!” I had made all of my own wedding stationery and it just seemed like the perfect idea.

I uploaded my first print on Etsy and when I got my first sale, I was just ecstatic! Fast forward to now and I have my own website and I’m now selling prints, phone cases, t-shirts, tote bags and other bits and bobs and I love every second. I’d always wanted a creative job but could never find anything that suited me until this.

I love to create empowering pieces that inspire people to love themselves. I want to create pieces that when people look at them or wear them, they feel so good about themselves. My t-shirts have been a massive hit and so many of my self love babes are wearing them. It makes me so proud to see them wearing something I’ve created, knowing that they feel empowered and that they are loving themselves wearing it.

Learning to Love my Body and my Stoma Bag

27-year-old Caz Caines, from Newbury, Berkshire is a make-up lover and compliance administrator. We chatted to Caz who is sharing her story about her stoma bag as a way of celebrating her body, spreading self love and helping others… 

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How did you feel when you first had the bag fitted? Can you tell us about why and how you came to have it? I have had my stoma [a pouch placed over the stomach to collect waste products that usually pass through the colon] for six years now. I was really poorly and admitted to hospital with a very swollen stomach, turns out my large intestine was so stretched and my organs were shutting down. When the surgeons opened me up my large intestine split. They had to operate and create a stoma, which I named Krang. I was so scared and upset but relieved. I woke up from surgery with the bag, totally unexpected and a big shock. After I got over the initial shock, I felt relieved because I knew that I’d feel better in myself, this could give me a new lease of life.

IMG_0705Did you always feel so confident? Nope, definitely not! I found that when I had surgery my body changed so much – I lost four stone while in hospital as I wasn’t allowed to eat for 10 days. I really started looking at it differently as I now had this ridiculously big scar with added poo bag on my stomach, not something you see everyday. So I felt a bit self conscious at first, that didn’t last long though. I started blogging soon after, speaking to other young people with stomas and really trying to encourage others to see themselves as the attractive, positive person they are or soon could be.

What advice would you give to others who struggle to feel good about themselves? You just gotta think this is the only life you’re gonna have so appreciate yourself and focus on the things you like. I love make-up and creating different looks with that, it really does make me feel better about myself. Get your nails done, put on your favourite music. Surround yourself with wonderful, hilarious people. My friends helped me out so much when I was poorly, they’re absolutely brilliant people. You always need that friend who will tell you to stop wallowing, I like people who are forward, you need people like that in your life.

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How do you try to celebrate your body? Is Instagram a way for you to do this? I just try and appreciate it the best I can, I’m not one to deny myself a pizza every week. Instagram can be a way, my recent bag picture did get a lot of positive comments and attention which is great, social media is crazy! I have spoken to more people who had bags, there is a big network of Ostomates on Instagram, more people are showing their bags off. I definitely have my down days and hangs up like everyone, I try not to let it get to me, I just need to remind myself that my bag saved my life so I should be bigging it up.

Why do you think sharing your story and spreading body positivity is important? Because there are so many people out there who probably feel a little lost after surgery, you really don’t feel 100% so I just want to show people, it’s cool, you’ll get back to feeling good again! You just gotta embrace what you have, even those without bags! You have one body, don’t listen to the magazines, you don’t have to be a certain way. I don’t want people who have bags to feel like they’re ugly, nor the people who don’t have them to think we are. I get messages from so many young people saying I’ve helped them feel more confident, it’s just so great, it’s nice knowing you’ve helped someone just by saying what you truly feel.

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How have tattoos helped? I had tattoos before surgery, I’ve always loved them. I do have a piece which I got last year by Jody Dawber – it is a lady with two sets of eyes, as if to say ‘don’t see yourself through other people’s eyes’. I wanted to get something that tied in with my message of body confidence and my bag as well as looking fabulous.
When I get a new tattoo it’s exciting, I get such a rush from seeing it go from paper to skin – I can’t stop looking at it once it’s been done and definitely can’t wait to show everyone this fantastic piece of art.

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What tattoo plans do you have? The plan has always been heavy coverage, I love the look. I was a stupid 18 year old and started on a sleeve which I now can’t stand and I’m working on blacking out. I want to get more work by Jody, she is definitely one of my favourite artists as her style is so cute and distinctive, it also helps that she’s so easy to talk to and would put anyone at ease. I would also love another Danielle Rose piece, her work is so stunning, it takes your breath away. I follow a few artists on IG, it is one of the easiest places to find new tattooers, so I have my eye on a few people currently – Craven Tattooer, Max Rathbone and Aimee Lou are a few I’m loving at the moment.

Nicole Leth: Sex and Ice Cream

23-year-old Nicole Leth is an artist and designer based in Kansas City, Missouri. We chatted to Nicole about her self love journey and her new store which will celebrate the work of hard-working female creatives… 

How would you describe your style? My style is Katy Perry meets Marilyn Monroe meets Jeremy Scott meets Yayoi Kusama meets tween girl in America all wrapped up in a Miami in the 1970’s colour palate.

What inspires you? I am inspired by day to day life and everything that goes along with it. When I first started designing I pulled a lot of inspiration from past relationships and break ups and now I like to view my work as an autobiography or visual diary where I can talk about things I’m experiencing and going through as a 23 year old woman in the world today. I like to translate these ideas and emotions through traditional textile processes, imagery from my diaries, and colour play. I guess to sum it all up: I’m inspired by the notion that everyone has a valid and important story to tell regardless of their age or gender.

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When will your new shop open? How have you made this happen? Do you have a background in retail?  Ah! My shop is opening on May 6th! ( Eeeee! I’M SO EXCITED!) I’ve been working my way up in retail jobs for the past four years and just recently quit all my other jobs to do Sex + Ice Cream full time. How did I make this happen? Hard work. No bull shitting. I don’t take days off — when I was working my other jobs I would work there for eight hours and then come home at night and work on my own stuff for eight more hours, fall sleep on a pile of sewing supplies, wake up and do it all over again.  I think that sometimes people underestimate what it means to be an artist, let alone have your own business, and make it work. I think its super important to set goals for yourself and be your own support system.

What can people expect to see in it? I’ll be selling my pieces that I’ve designed over the years. Everything that is for sale on my online store you’ll also be able to buy in my shop! I’ll also be selling one of a kind items that I’ve hand sewn and hand painted the fabric of. Also, I’ve brought in a lot of work from some of my favourite brands and artists from around the world! Lots of ceramic pieces, zines, handmade panties, patches, pins, and all that jazz. I like to think of it as a badass collective of work made and designed by extremely talented female makers.

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Are there any artists that you’ll be collaborating with? I think collaborating is one of the most important and stimulating parts about being a practising artist. I’m working on a million different projects: doing surface design on clay pieces from ceramic artists, creating handmade candles in candle holders with a candle girl, working with photographers and video graphers to produce digital work, and with writers on zines!

On your website you say that your garments are your personal diary, what do you mean by this? I mean it in both a very literal and theoretical way. A lot of my pieces have imagery or doodles that have been scanned directly from my diary pages and printed on the fabric. Other pieces I literally treat as my diary and hand draw, write, or paint on the fabric to record what’s going on in my life, what is exciting me or making me sad. Designing garments is a way for me to express my words in a visual way.

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Do you see yourself as a feminist? Yes.

How do you hope to empower and inspire other women? I chose to start designing and creating clothing because I had gone through a bad break up and wanted to do something to empower myself and reclaim the person I knew I was. That was a pivotal, breakthrough moment for me and led me to discover something I was truly passionate about and a future that I wanted for myself. Most importantly, it made me realise how I strong I could be on my own, for myself. I think every women should feel that way — like they are capable of attaining anything in the whole goddamn world. I think the thing that a lot of women connect to in my work is the way I tell stories openly, without shame.
Recently, I’ve also been doing a lot of community work with young women’s organisations. I’ve done a few empowerment workshops where I tell my story, talk about relationships and ambitions, and create shirts with the girls.

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Is self love and body positivity important to you? Is it something you want to share? Yes. Its one of the driving forces behind my work and the stories I tell.

Can you tell us about your own self love journey? My self love journey has been a long one with lots of ups and downs. My childhood was filled with endless crash diets and gym memberships. At my thinnest I’ve weighed 120 pounds and at my heaviest I was over 200. I’ve been in relationships that were so tormenting I lost 50 pounds and I’ve been put on medicines that made me gain it all back. It was hard to have a healthy and accurate relationship with my body because it felt like something that was always changing and that I had no control over.

It took years and years and years but over the past two years especially I have developed an intense love and acceptance for my body. It feels really good to finally be content. I think its important to realize and understand that your body is something that cannot be labelled. That your health and self love is not something that can be determined by someone else. That your body is the one thing that has been with you since the beginning and helped you get through every hardship you’ve endured. That your body is beautiful and perfect as it is at this very moment in time.

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Can you tell us about your tattoos? Which was your first, do you still love it? My first tattoo is a big feather that turns into birds on my lower back. My father passed away when I was 17 so it was something I got for him. Since then, I’ve gotten a lot of tattoos — all of which have personal meaning to me. My tattoos act a lot like a diary as well — I get them to record exact moments in time, experiences, feelings that I never want to forget. I have a portrait of my cat Sprinkle on my forearm (she was the first pet I ever adopted on my own, she’s handicapped and the most loving cat I’ve ever had). I have a few matching tattoos with people who I love. I have a diamond tattooed on my ring finger (my love for myself will always be the most important, I will always belong to myself). I have tally marks on my hand counting how many people I’ve truly been in love with in my life (right now there are two, I hope to add more to it someday).

Love your body with Laura Vudé

 Laura Vudé is a 25-year-old Australian artist, photographer and plus size model. We chatted to her about being a body positive advocate, her style inspirations and the tattoos on her body…

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How did you get into modelling? I was photographing people and realising my selfies were killer and wanted to have people take my photo because I’m super vain. I’m only half joking. Then people on my tumblr started to respond to them, so I started collaborating with Melbourne based designers like Lunasea Creations last year and realized that it made me feel so positive and like I was doing something worthwhile so I continued from there. It also helped being surrounded by beautifully creative folk.

Do you have any tips for readers for loving themselves? Or not giving a crap about what others think? I get comments most days which are so kind coming from women who are so happy to see a fat beautiful person (because yes, we exist.) and for so long I felt the same way. Try and surround yourself with people who make you feel on top of the world. Who don’t put you down and who honestly make you believe you are worthy of love, kindness and push you to not only better yourself but help you strive for what you are after. I am so, so fortunate to have such an incredible network of close friends who are as body positive and are all differing sizes and willing to talk about it.

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Photo: Michael Brock

How have you become body confident? Honestly through taking a lot of selfies. I used to do a lot of self portraiture back in 2009 when I suppose I started to really feel beautiful and I really liked my eyes. Then a few years later once iPhones were a thing, I found myself taking more and more images. I started taking pictures of myself in lingerie because I hadn’t seen anyone who looked like me in lingerie anywhere. The internet responded well and was mostly women responding to them and it felt like something special. The body positive movement on tumblr really helped me become more confident as well, just seeing other plus size women flaunting their beautiful selves was very inspiring.

What does plus size mean to you? Do you consider yourself plus size? I do consider myself plus size, curvy, fat, whatever you want to call me I’m fine with. It took a lot of time but when you break it down they are just describing words and it’s the inflection the person uses, is really how it will always be taken.

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Photo: Lucy Dickinson for 35mmstyle

How would you describe your style? 50% mesh, 20% lingerie goddess, 25% pastel princess, 5% goth.

Where do you get your inspiration from? Sounds super cliche but I’m inspired by my friends and the queer community. Im inspired by femmes wearing pastel lipstick and outrageously high platforms. I’m in love with colour and will usually look to be one of the more colourful folks in the room.

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Photo: Hana Haley for Alexandrea Anissa Lingerie

Can you tell us about your tattoos? Okay I’ll go feet, up: On my ankle I have “me” in a heart to remind myself that I’m the best by my friend Kyle. On my left calf I have an avocado and avocado tree surrounded by mountains because my favourite thing is avos. Which was a stick and poke done by Grant.

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My right thigh has a pin up named Audrey, who isnt actually based on Twin Peaks Audrey but it kinda just turned out that way. I’m pretty into it. By Kat Weir at Fox Body Art in Collingwood, Melbourne. My left thigh has a pink jacket with the words “it’s like the rules of feminism” written around it- a Mean Girls quote. Mean Girls was important for me as a teen, which was one by someone at Third Eye Tattoo in Carlton, Melbourne but to be honest was a bit of a jerk who almost mispelt feminism on my body. What an ass.

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Above that I have another new pin up who’s still in the very beginning stages. Chris drew me a chubby witch and I had to have her. Whilst I was in New York I got a beautiful fern by my friend Moritz and it’s one of my favourites. Keeping New York close to my heart.

Just this week I got a hand holding lavender and baby’s breath flowers done by Amelia at Berserk Tattoos, who’s a doll, whilst a friend of mine was down from Brisbane.

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Which was your first? Do you still love it? My first professional tattoo was my pin up, done at Fox Body Art in Collingwood Melbourne by Kat Weir. She’s a super talented, sweet babe and I’m so happy with how my pin up turned out. My first tattoo ever was a home job by a friend of a friend. I had just moved out of home and was feeling super free and felt like having femme written on my body was very important for my own identity. Still is.

I love all of my tattoos. I love my body. Even if I end up disliking some at some point I’ll remember the time when I got them and that’s part of the great thing about tattoos. They show a significant or not so significant decision in your life. It’s a beautiful mark.

Do you have any tattoo plans? Not too many because I somehow have gotten four tattoos in the past month! I do want to get a cute girl power tattoo at some point though, something really simple with basic line work.

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Photo: Michael Brock